Here I am Lord...

So I am not doing too well with updating this blog and wondering if I will continue. But for now, here is a little inspiration...

I have always had a heart for older people. I really enjoy spending time with people who are so seasoned in life and who have learned so much about the world and humanity. Thus, I always have a need to reach out to older people who cross my path.

I met a wonderful woman when I was in college and attending a seniors Bible study (yes, I signed up for the wrong one, but loved it so much that the 60+ year-old women allowed me to join). She has an incredible life story and is originally from Pakistan but she and he family had to flee to Lebanon when she was a child. She has lived in numerous countries during her lifetime and speaks in a heavy accent.

I kept in touch with her during our years in Annville and now that we are back in the area I make it a point to visit with her once a month or so. A year ago her son passed away and her faith in God was shattered. She is so brokenhearted that she says she doesn't believe in God at all anymore. Her only living child lives a few hours away and she does not seem to have too many friends. But, for some reason she allows me into her home for afternoon visits and enjoys my company. I visited with her last year but, after I had Noah, our visits changed drastically.

The first time I brought the little two month old to her home, she wept. As she held him in her arms she wept for the loss of her own son. Our visits since then have been full of healing and recently, joy. Yesterday on our visit she was playing with Noah and making funny faces. Noah started laughing hysterically and soon enough she followed suit. I have not heard her laugh in over a year. She was overjoyed with him and held/played with him for over an hour.

Every now and then I try to talk with her about God, but mostly I just listen to her sorrow. At one point in our visit, I watched the two of them play and thought "God you are so at work right now... please use us show her your Grace". Our visit ended and she began to tear up when it was time for us to go. I believe in my heart that she felt the presence of God though Noah's love and joy.

My prayer is that we can minister to her during her time of doubt and pain. Isn't that what God does? He loves us and holds us no matter what our feelings are about Him...no matter how much we squirm and fuss... His strong hands hold us closer until we eventually realize that it's by His grace we are saved.

If God can use an 8 month old to show others His love, God surely can use us!